Father's Day 2016
Most of you do not know that my stepfather adopted me when I was in the 8th grade. Why would you know – we have the same last name. My mom, dad, and I make the perfect trio. My stepfather (Dad) paid for my straight teeth, gymnastic classes, college education, car, and everything in between. My stepfather (Dad) took me to the doctor, dried my tears, loved me, and so much more. I laugh when people say you look just like your dad!
Recently, my mom told my son that my dad adopted me. I was so mad… Furious actually … I do not care what you think about me, but I was never going to tell him the truth. Mainly out of respect for everything my father has done for me. I never wanted my son to question who his real grandfather is. My father loves my son unconditionally and I sometimes think he loves him more than even me. I am a very self-centered person, but this truth actually makes me happy.
I know many of you can relate, but my biological father disappointed me time and time again. He missed birthdays, child support, holidays, and so very much more! The straw that broke the camel’s back was when he did not show up for the court date to have my name changed. I was finally old enough to realize he really did not care. He did not care that I was going to take another man’s last name. But my adopted dad always cared and he was always there for me.
I listen to the ShePraise.com prayers when I write my blogs. The first song that played today was Forgiveness. Ha… I know this blog sounds like I have not forgiven my “real” dad. I have forgiven him, but I feel like forgiveness is sometimes a daily thing we need to remember to do. Is it realistic to expect a child to forgive a father who basically abandoned her and her mother? I have forgiven him, but it still makes me so mad when I think about what he put my mother through. So, I try to forgive him anytime I pray for Forgiveness. I do not know if am capable of 100% forgiveness, but I am trying.
For Father’s Day I sat down to write a sweet and touching story about my wonderful and amazing dad whom I love with my entire heart and soul, but clearly I am still struggling to forgive my birth father. If you are struggling too this weekend you are not alone. Matthew 18:21-22 tells us to “forgive over and over.” Why over and over, because it is hard to forgive! Proverbs 17:9 says “LOVE prospers when a fault is FORGIVEN.” Let love prosper!
Update Father's Day 2019
Christmas 2018, I got a call that my biological father only had a few more days to live. I rushed to the hospital in rural Texas to pray with him and let him know that I had forgiven him. I wanted to say it one more time - one last time "I forgive you!" He passed as I drove up. I missed it, like he missed so many milestones in my life. But here is the beauty of prayer, you can tell God everything and He will take care of it for you. I asked God to tell my biological father again that I forgave him and I know that he did!
Give all your burdens to the LORD and He will take care of you! Psalm 55:22